<( ' ' )> Friday, March 20, 2009
Do you know about the mice experiment? The one where one passes a voltage over the cheese and if the mice touches it it'll get shocked. Each time the mice touches it, it quickly withdraws, but after all it soon forgets why it isn't eating the cheese and tries again. Apparently, the mice is about as smart as me.
After giving bright sunshiny reviews of the cinema such as"DUDE WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT ABOUT!" and "THAT TOTALLY FRIGGIN WASTED MY MONEY!", it is rather strange that I had actually agreed on a class outing to Matt Land and participitate in everybody's favourite pass-the-time in a friendly warm and happy get-together-esque setting at the cinema, and once again, the film has been nothing short of spectacular, from the bottom. And I'm totally confident in saying that it has NOT been a total waste of my time, money and face without the slightest hint of sarcasm... In addition to that I sought no comfort whatsoever among my classmates because I'm too manly and decided to whine about it on the blog instead...
Let me start with the name of the movie. Push.
If you were thinking ".... What? That's not even a name!! What's the meaning of this? I'm paying 7 freaking 50 for a show which has a crappy name such as that? That's not hardcore!!" Most likely you can imagine what torture I had to go through... At this point you must be also thinking...
If you think the movie is about 100 mins of pushing somebody with hardstyle techno as the bg, sadly it isn't that cool. Ok spoiler time since I know you non-existant readers won't watch it anyway...
Stupid psychokinesis dude meets stupid psychic girl. Another stupid psychic women joins the gang. Stupid psychic china gang wants to get some suitcase. The merry gang of 3 also wants to get the suitcase. The psychic division also wants to get the suitcase. They make a big hoo ha about some bullshit. Merry gang of 3 wins. The end.
If that didnt sound stupid enough, I really don't know what is...
BUT if the story went something like....
Stupid psychokinesis dude meets super hardcore manly Alma, then Alma obliges to help psychokinesis dude in finding the suitcase! However!! Super hardcore manly Alma actually sought world domination! After helping stupid psychokinesis dude, she releases the UltraManly M virus in the suitcase and turn the whole world population into MANLY! Then darkness decends upon Earth and a certain unnamed country will reign supreme....
Wow now that's a movie I'd definately watch.
Sadly Hollywood is H for whore and they only cater to pussy people who can't handle manliness.
Conclusion? Cinema sucks. Big time.
Solution? Spend the munney on booze instead (BUT NOT VODKA!!)
BubblyJelly @ 4:44 PM
domo 4:44 PM
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