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<( ' ' )> Monday, December 8, 2008

After watching resident evil degeneration,I gained a sudden burst of inspiration and came to a major realisation that...Singapore's 3D animation really sucks shit.Sing to the dawn cant even compare to this on ANY scale!Apart from the scale of poor animation of course.

But a more important thing we all should know,is that it can happen ANYTIME,ANYWHERE to ANYONE!A zombie invasion that is.With terrorism reaching an unprecedented level of complexity and planning,as proved by the mumbai bombings,it is only a matter of time before they bring in biochemical weapons and start turning people into mindless zombies.

WE MUST BE PREPARED!

And how,you ask,can we protect ourselves from ravenous zombies when we reside in a country which makes owning firearms illegal?That is simple.With my knowledge and expertise in this field,I shall share several techniques to take out zombies in hoards.

1.Water gun flamethrower.Rather obvious huh?

2.Matt shield.Simply tell them that the zombies are a SOCCER team who said that the matts have no SOCCER skills whatsoever.The matts will be infuriated and charge headfirst into the fray with soccer balls,and start playing a mindless game of SOCCER with the equally mindless zombies.Of course,the zombie team will keep increasing in numbers,while the converse happens to the matt team,which isn't really fair for them...But who cares?It gives the Chinese time to carry out their sly plan.Which brings me to point 3.

3.Stock up on all brands of shampoo.Dammit,if heads and shoulders shampoo can kill aliens(Evolution),I think neutrogena should do the same to zombies!Neutrogena smells so much better than heads and shoulders!Stupid commercialisation saves the day again!!!

4.Blanket of darkness.Just stuff the zombies in an MRT train bound for
印度 station at around 5pm.The zombies will run amok as they are engulfed by darkness.A S.W.A.T. team can now swoop in and fire shampoo at the zombies as well as live rounds at everything that moves,to further the cause of the Ku Ke La Xi clan.Ethnic cleansing....Yeah...
5.Ask dumb teenagers to start blasting trashy trendy pop music from their handphones eg.Rihana,Teh Ting Tings and all that nonsense.The zombies' brains will explode instantly.Of course,mine will sustain major damage too.But what is a loss of 12 IQ points from a pool of 99999999999?Infinitesimal.

Now that we all know how to protect ourselves from zombies,lets all do our part to make Singapore a zombie-free society!

Yes.I know you're very grateful for this article you MDA watchdog looking at this site....




CherryDonut @ 10:25 AM
domo 10:25 AM

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