<( ' ' )> Monday, March 31, 2008
Peanut here. To be cool in real life, you'll have to look out for certain important things. Now I shall talk about cars. Sure you guys most likely don't have cars yet, or you wouldn't be reading this blog in the first place. Anyway... Ah yes. Let's look at the few features on how you can "zhng my car".
Type of car:
Of course all of you guys will want to buy. Nope not Ferrari, neither a Lamboghini. But yes. AN ELECTRIC CAR!!! In [country], cars don't need to be fast. Just look fast, sound fast, then can already. Any electric car will do, as long as the top speed is below 50km/h and runs on battery. Then people will ask me "Where can speed with electric car ar?" Carpark lor (Speed limit 25 km/h leh!). Now we will see how to zhng your electric car.
For your future electric car to look cool and sound great, your pipe must be... Yes i know what you're thinking... EXTRA SMALL. Reasons is obvious... But i shall state it down for the benefit of those who doesn't. If pipe small small, then the air get compressed. After compress finish, the carbon dioxide become dry ice ar. Then the dry ice get spurted out, then got the "Putt Putt" sound ar. Pipe small small also very good, cos look very nice. You want put big big not nice one. You want so small until bacteria can fit inside. Then look fierce!
2. Turbocharge sound
Your car must also sound fierce one. Don't sound fierce, cannot scare people one. So must install turbocharger. If no money, can install turbocharge sound. If still not enough money, go buy hand-dryer. Actually recommended you go buy hand-dryer, cos got latest sensor technology. Somemore can dry your hand when it's wet. Then somemore it'll give you the "NNNNGggggNNGGG" sound when the turbocharge charge up. There? Sound fierce right? But cannot put too many, or your electric car will fly.
3. Umzheh Umzheh machine
Your car no music not good. Must have music, then sound fierce. How to sound nice? Must buy the PSP speakers. Then buy alot. Then install. But remember, speaker must face outside... Why? Music not for you to hear. For other people to hear, then think you fierce. Also you must buy alot of RECHARGEABLE batteries to make the speakers work. And save the earth at the same time. Then good speakers still not good enough, still need good music. Like that famous famous techno song by Bird Thong Chye "Sabai Sabai". Ah.. then can Um(Sa)........ ZHEH(BAI)......... Um(Sa)......... ZHEH(BAI). Then can sound fierce.
4. Hairwax holder
Car fierce driver not fierce, cannot make it. Driver like car must defy gravity one. That's why must install hairwax holder. You know Digital D also got hairwax holder? Hairwax holder good. Can put the hairwax inside then like digital d, the hairwax rotate ar, rotate. If hairwax never spill, that means that your driving very zai. Then hairwax holder also can style your hair to defy gravity one. And while driving. Imagine this. You're driving, with one hand on the wheel. Then you use your left hand to scoop up some hairwax to slather on your hair. All this at an amazing speed of..... 30 KM/H!!!!! WOW! And the wax never spill :)
Ok i'll stop here. I'll finish the second part of Lesson No.6 (Coolness in Realife) Part II next time. I'll see you soon. Till then, bb!!! Oh an as of today, all posts will be published WEEKLY on saturday or sunday. So we'll see you over the weekend :)